It goes to figure then, that you also love doing these things in the shadow of a nice, life-sized replica of Tyrannosaurus Rex.

Ebay seller “Bars, Cigars and Brew: Purveyors of Fine Living” offers humidors, jewelry, antique furniture and glassware, and apparently, competitive pricing ($25K) on Jurassic, 20-foot-tall dinosaur statues. They are shipped in 40-foot crates from the Philippines, which, if you ask me, has all of the makings of a bizarre action movie sequence.

Visit the life-sized dinosaur auction.

GERI

When seller tnbettyboop went on a 5-state yard sale tour to see what she could find, it’s doubtful that she imagined finding this.

“My partner and I both spotted this beauty at the same time,” she says in the auction description. “She was sitting on a saddle, draped in a red Matador’s cape, SO INTRIGUING! No wig, a man’s face and grandma’s boobs.”

While she looks like she should be a prop in some esoteric independent film, “GERI” is, in fact, a learning device for nursing students who work with geriatric patients. She has bedsores, cancerous (and noncancerous) moles, injection panels on her arms, differently sized pupils and real genitalia for catheter practice (this one has female parts, but a full, new model can apparently be switched out for male bits).

A “Simulaid” in the tradition of Rescue/CPR Annie, Geri is proof that medical education prop makers don’t like to sugar coat  the nature of the human body. Other products on their web site include “Fat Old Fred,” “ALS trauma head,” “EVA the Gynecologic Manikin,” and even the all-new “CasPer the CPR dog.”

Visit the “GERI: The Complete Nursing Skills Manikin” auction

When I asked him how it happened, he told me that another boy did it to him. Alarmed that maybe my kid had been punched in the face without anyone noticing, I probed a little more.

“He didn’t hit me. He didn’t mean it,” my son said. “He was just chubby cheeking me!”

If you also enjoy various forms of facial persecution, eBay has a box of four life-sized fiberglass heads available. A rod with bolts pulls appears to pull the the cheeks together and the eyes are sewn shut. And you can paint them whatever color your heart desires.

Visit the “Tortured Face” auction.

The “Ex Knife Set” is a storage unit in which you can plunge five sharp utensils into a body that lives on your kitchen counter. The featureless form stands in a stunned posture and has highly visible entrance and exit wounds. One customer did suggest that the plastic item seemed like it would have been better as a ceramic piece, but they claimed to still be happy with the purchase. No one in the seller feedback made any claims as to its therapeutic benefits.

See one of the “Ex Knife Set” auctions. Or visit the seller’s store, where the set also comes in red, pink and other colors.